Tuesday, August 31, 2004

Big Media SUCKS

I have to break my blog silence to give due props to the Brotherman for dealing with the absolute garbage we’re being assailed with from Big Media in respect to what’s good for John “Where’s my spine?” Kerry and what’s bad for George “Leader” Bush.
An article form the AP via Yahoo! News just lit me up white hot this morning. The best part is that it only took the title, which has no backup from the body of the article.
Read it here and tell me if I’m wrong. I’m not, so don’t bother juicing me up with your tree-hugging liberal hippie crap. The GOP convention in downtown Liberalville is gonna be great. I hope Maria joins Arnold on the stage to publicly back Bush, and then spits on Moore’s crumpled corpse after he gets officially Terminated.
As for me – I’ll be watching Hockey on ESPN2 tonite. Mario is playing, and so all else gets blacked out. At least for a short while, anyway. Then the Icemen will go back to their whiny Union ways, and we’ll have a great 2005-06 NHL Season.

Thursday, August 19, 2004

Middle Child

Dream Monster
I’m pretty much resigned to diverting any college funding for my second-born to extensive therapy sessions. The classic middle-child has shown us yet once again that she is a mental mess, and our abilities as parents are vaudevillian attempts to lead and educate her to be a well-rounded little person.
Yeah – Delaney is a trip. I need to divulge her recent display of oddity, and I don’t want to hear the adage “Oh, she’s a chip off the ‘ol block” because even when compared to me – this kid is OUT THERE. She LOOKS ok, but that’s pure evil for you. What goes on INSIDE… whoa.
Here’s the tip of the iceberg of evil. Waterfowl. I don’t know why, but the kid has something for them. For a while here ‘Laney has had a fascination with penguins. It started off with death-like abject terror, but then migrated to some type of idolatry. No – it’s got nothing to do the weak-ass hockey team. I’m talking REAL penguins. As parents we used this fear as a tool, getting her to comply with dinner and bath orders with threats of penguin invasions and such. Now she would welcome a large group of penguin visitors, and has been bugging us to visit them at the zoo. But what else?
The next bird of prey would present itself at the breakfast table. Quite non-chalant over her Rice Crispies the ChildTM tells us all about her dream she had that night. She dreamt of a pelican (and probably a large one) that swept down to her, chewed her into pieces, and ate her. Not quite done, the pelican announced that she did not taste good, and promptly spit her out. At that, she smiled, and went about finishing her breakfast, leaving the WifeTM and I in parental shock.
Dream interpretation? Screw that – I don’t want to know how bad I messed up in parenting. I think we even started previewing the Animal Planet for a while. Visions of Dante’s ninth circle played in my head, and I had to remind myself that the kid just doesn’t or shouldn’t know about that yet. You boil all this down and what do you get? Typical middle child. I really wonder what bird will come out next though…

Friday, August 13, 2004

"Child? Halo reservation for one..."

Julia sleeps with these guys now
Alas – if there was anything redeeming about the French – it might be some of their food, or at least the art of the sauce. And who came along to show the general meatloaf lovin’ Americans how to use the saucepan for something other than braining their cheating spouses? None other than dear ‘ol Julia Child.
She was a tough broad, and in her prime I bet she could beat the hell out of any stunad to criticize her quiche too harshly. If not then drink him under the table and take his wallet.
So – in honor of the Mean Queen of French Cuisine – let’s all go and make a big mess in the kitchen, cut ourselves, and finish the bottle of wine we were cooking with.
I miss her already.

Wednesday, August 04, 2004

Cash Update!

A voice from the Great Divide gave me a link to some AM radio action that seems to have the Man in Black on quite often. If yer sittin' at yer PC and have some available bandwidth - give 'ol KCUV a listen.
Share and enjoy.

Monday, August 02, 2004


The Man in Black
It only took a month, but I finally got off my keister and got me one of the best cds EVER. That’s right – I got me the 16 greatest from the Man in Black himself – Mr. Johnny Cash.
Now – I am one that just does NOT advocate both of those kinds of music, and when I say both kinds, I’m talking about Country AND Western. This is different than that Reba Barf Brooks crapola you instantly retch and look for a dog to run over whenever you accidentally hear four strummed chords of. This is raw, pure and simple story tellin’ re-fall in love with beer kinda music. It sure ain’t the Beastie Boys, but the rhymes do me just right.
When I was just a baby my mama told me. Son,
always be a good boy, don't ever play with guns.
But I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die
now every time I hear that whistle I hang my head and cry…

Ok – if you can’t appreciate the Cash – then maybe you should check out my other great parental purchase in terms of kids-based music. What makes this one of the greatest picks ever for the kids was the fact that the WifeTM was responsible for finding and buying it. Props deserved.

Keep listenin’ kids…